There are innumerable different creatures in this world many of which have not yet been discovered. We have your average house pet such as a cat, a goldfish, or a parakeet. Then there are some unusual creatures like the blob fish, the platypus, and the giraffe. But even among such creatures there are things far more fantastic and peculiar indeed. It is in this category that you’ll find the telepathic hermit crab.

The telepathic hermit crab, or Aloqui garrulis, is a nearly extinct species. They were discovered about two years ago by Gary Henderson when he heard arguing while he was walking along a seemingly abandoned shoreline. Closer observation led him to notice two hermit crabs gesturing angrily at each other. They stopped so as to ask him politely not to listen in on their private conversation. Gary kindly obliged and went on his way. However, over a course of several months, he would bring this couple gifts and do them such favors as giving them transportation and doing various household tasks. Eventually he was invited to dinner and he has been fast friends with this arthropodous couple ever since then.

In his time with them, Mr. Henderson was able to study these creatures and learn a lot about them. The scientific community does not accept Mr. Henderson’s discover to be factually based, but he stands his ground. Chester and Petunia (the hermit crabs) do not wish to have their personal lives intruded upon by the presence of news reporters and fans, so Mr. Henderson, wishing to respect the wishes of his good friends, has refrained from using them as proof of his statements.

We’re not completely sure as to the origin of the telepathic hermit crab. We would suspect it is closely related to the talking lobsters of the ninth dimension, but such a suggestion would be offensive, so we have not asked. The lobsters of ninth are not known for being the most sanitary beings in the Paracosmos.

As to the hermit crabs’ ability, they appear to have a special organ right next to their brains that sends signals much like radio waves. We apparently have similar abilities, or at least the receiving end of the circuit, as we are able to pick up these signals. The signals are received in the cochlea, which seems to have a secondary use next to picking up sound waves. When we pick up telepathic signals, the cochlea translates them to sounds, but with somewhat different dimensions. The signals cannot travel long distances (as far as we can tell) but they travel just as normally as sound would.

Chester and Petunia told Gary Henderson that the telepathic hermit crab community has been doing quite well. There are only a few hundred of them, scattered mostly across the Caribbean coast with a few along the Colorado beach. In spite of their small numbers, they have been living comfortably and happily. No one disturbs them often, and they keep to themselves.

If you have more information about this extraordinary species, please tell us in the comments below. Much is yet to be learned, and we would like as much new research as we can gather. Please like this post, follow the blog, and avoid death at all costs.

Ever onward,

Jacob Unger.